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I Did My Time, Let Me GoI can't remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
We're all okay until the day we're not
The surface shines while the inside rots
It seems just like yesterday was the first time that I heard You call my name
Since then, so much has changed
So take your eyes off the trigger
I'm not to blame if your world turns to black
You never go, you're always here
Under my skin, I cannot run away
It's beyond my control
Sometimes it's best to let go
Holding out for more than I deserve
And hanging on to all your careless words
Every driven word
Like a hammer hell to my head
Run and tell all of the angels, this could take all night
Think I need a devil to help me get things right
And in our time that you wasted
All of our bridges burned down
Well my heart knows me better than I know myself
So I'm gonna let it do all the talking
I did my time and I want out, so effusive
Fate, it doesn't cut, the soul is not so vibrant
It's time to forget about the past
To wash away what happened last
To Whom It ConcernsI leave the note on the table...
To whom it concerns,
Do not mourn
For my disease is cured.
To whom it concerns...
The bath is filled
Driping onto the floor
The water is warm.
To whomever finds me...
One toe dips in the dirty water.
Will they miss me?
I only have little time.
To whom even cares...
Water fills the nose,
To whom will miss me...
To whom loves me anymore...
One last look through the dirty water.
One last smile.
One last breath.
To whom I'm leaving...
To whom it concerns.
Just FriendsShe keeps me up at night.
The endless thoughts of her...
Her laugh replays in my head
Like a soft song.
Her smile is seared into my head
Like my own ray of sunshine
In endless darkness.
Everything about her is perfect.
Even when she doesn't think so.
She doesn't feel the same way about me.
She loves me only as a friend,
And probably only ever will...
And at times I hate myself
For letting my fear get in the way
Of telling her,
But it could push her away.
I feel her every emotion.
When she is happy
I am happy.
When she is sad
I am sad.
But it never seems to be enough for her,
I never seem to be enough for her...
But perhaps one day
In the distant future
She will wake up from her sleep,
That the perfect guy for her
Was sitting next to her the whole time.
My saviorHe took my hand,
And led me to the edge.
The sky was on fire
The birds escaped to their homes
For a long nights rest.
The water below foamed and sprayed
As the ocean and sky fought in an endless battle
Of yin and yang.
It was beautiful,
And I was happy.
I peared below
Down the rocky cliff
I lost my balance...
He grabbed my hand,
And I leaned percariously out
As the ocean reached up for me.
I looked into his eyes
Cold and dark
The one I once loved.
I waited for him to pull me back
To save me
Like he once did
With a wicked smile on his face
He let go,
And I fell
And the ocean opened her mouth,
And swallowed me whole.
As the sky laughed along
As the fire turned to ash,
And the warmth faded...
I seen the light.
She called to me,
And for once in what seemed like
Such a long time
I was not afraid.
But I knew when the pain returned
It was not over
I was not done...
The sand on my back
The Silent KillerLike a ghost in the night
A white shadow in the darkness
Silent as the grave
It hunts you.
Teeth like daggers,
Claws like knifes,
Eyes of an Eagle,
It stalks you.
It can hear your heart quicken
It can smell your fear.
Better run now
Its after you.
Its faster than you
It enjoys the chase
One bite and its over
Its playing with you.
Its breath is on your neck
Its growl is a whisper in your ear
Its ready to pounce.
So tell me
Who's afraid of the big bad wolf?
Suit Of ArmorWhat people see on my outside
Isn't really me.
It's just a suit of armor
With a welded smile.
What people see on my outside
Isn't who I am.
I say things I don't believe,
And hide the things I like.
What people see on my outside
Isn't how I feel.
I laugh and joke and play,
But I'm alone in a crowd.
So before you're quick to judge me
Because what you see on my outside
Probably isn't me.
I Am YouI am the reason why you cry at night
Why there are marks on your wrist,
And why the pain won't go away.
I am the reason why you are scared of the dark
Why you bleed,
And why you wish you were dead.
I am why you are alone
Why you run,
But I always find you.
I am the monster
Of your greatest nighmares,
And why you hate yourself.
I am you.
I'm A WriterI'm a writer
I see the world not as pictures and colors,
But as words and paragraphs.
I'm a writer
My tools are not brushes or paint,
But fingers and pencils.
I'm a writer
I do not get mad at a mistake of the hand,
But the mistake of my mind and my language.
I'm a writer
Erasers were made for you,
And white-out was made for me.
I'm a writer,
And I see not for what the world is,
But of what it could be.
I'm a writer...
Ode To Writer's BlockStaring at the piece of paper
Without the faintest idea
Of what to write, I sit
In my chair, pencil not moving
Madness gaining another step
I wonder how many mornings
Or perhaps it was evening time
When Frost sat down to write, that he-
Spent staring at the empty page
Clueless about subject matter
Writer's block, such bloody torment
Making a wanker out of me
Always appearing at my door
At a most inconvienant time
What a terrible patron
I hear them everywhere.
Talking about me, and them...
Making me insecure.
I can't handle that.
They don't know that...
I've been bullied by someone I used to know already.
I don't want to be bullied by others too...
they're passed down as I just cry on.
I just keep everything to myself,
thinking that if I'll just keep it to myself,
I'll be fine.
"Only rainbows after rain,
the sun will always shine again.
So you gotta keep your head up."
Is my motto.
Do you think this will help?
That I'll be happy?
This helps me realize,
that maybe keeping it in,
won't help a lot.
Maybe. Just maybe,
I'm not the only one who has this problem too..
MonsterI'm the monster.
No, I don't need to hide under your bed,
inside your thoughts is good enough for me.
Only help will make me go away,
and I make sure you don't get it ever.
I come when your full of high spirits,
and push you down into a pit of despair.
Sometimes, I leave and make you
feel the cold numbness you despise.
You'd rather hurt then be numb,
and welcome me back.
Only the strong ones can shake me off,
and continue on their right path;
instead of the bad one I've created for you.
Suicidal BreathsWith a decrease in energy,
Fatigue, sick-to-stomach and feelings of mortality,
She still survives,
Though she buries herself in broken lies.
She says she's fine,
She's just okay,
But deep down inside,
She's full of sorrowful pain.
She believes what she hears,
And avoids what she sees,
Feeling the sad, pity, indescribable beliefs.
She sits in a corner full of isolation and guilt,
Darkness and ache,
Counting the pills she spilled.
White and Blue,
Just one more.
Vision becoming blurry,
She's shaky and becoming worried.
Looking in a reflection,
Ribs soon distinguishable,
Bones and fright just popping out,
She screams inside and yells for help.
No one's around,
She can't hear a subtle sound.
She pleads to why she's on this earth,
Why her mother had to give birth.
She falls to the ground,
Blending into the darkness of the unspoken place,
She cries and cries,
Soon she'll be erased.
HeartbrokenHearts are left broken, by words unspoken,
that seems to be what they say.
But why, then, after spoken words,
do my tears fall every day.
I told her how she makes me feel,
how I wish to hold her near.
That her smile illuminates my world,
and makes everything suddenly clear.
But she she crushed my heart when she said those words,
"I just think of you as a friend..."
What makes it worse, what hurts much more,
is I will still love her to the end.
They Hate Me Because I'm A Writer.They hate me because I’m a writer, because I don’t live in their world.
They hate me because I can so easily detach myself from this painful reality, with just the type of a key or stroke of a pencil.
I plan scenarios that they’ve never thought of, heard of, nor dreamed of. I use characters as pieces of a puzzle, or cards in a game, throwing them through obstacles that are unimaginable.
I create worlds that make macabre look as welcoming as light, and agony taste as sweet as sugar.
I will twist you and cause you to question your own humanity.
When you step into my universe, you will never be the same.
If you choose to stay, I may engulf you in my horrors,
And if you choose to leave, you will find that it will be hard for you to fully escape me.
It’s your choice to hate me, and scorn me for not being like others.
It’s your choice to come with me, and become my companion, an equal ruler of this world I have created.
Imperfect WriterWords are written in a fluid motion.
The thoughts are rushing; there’s so much commotion.
Cramps arise from within my wrist.
The story continues on without a murderous twist.
Stress has crept along my back,
For there’s something I believe I lack.
I can see the blood, the horror, and the hate.
But I cannot find whatever I expected would be great.
Every time there’s something missing,
Something that I don’t believe I’m overanalyzing.
So, I add and add and add until I find a fit,
But the unknown stretches to Beyond and I lose it.
Therefore, I make it all new again and again.
It all starts over, though, and I know I cannot win.
I dread the day when the unknown will consume everything whole,
And I’m left with another unfinished goal.
I’m an imperfect writer; that much is true.
But I’m not alone; you’re with me, too.
We, writers, all have been cursed,
For the good and for the worst.
Our thoughts are contaminated with lies,
And they expand
Depression - What It Is InsideTrapped and enclosed,
It can't be exposed.
It knows all we're taught,
and contradicts every word.
We become it's biggest addict.
It has no faith.
It has no love.
It comes too late into the age,
And chokes all who feel it hang,
To evict us from our home.
Without a fault.
Without a soul.
It's nothing we should know.
Guilty of sitting alone,
Unworthy of what others deserve.
No need for fears,
No need to pretend.
Only a desire to disappear.
Don't reach for the brightest hand,
Just crawl away.
This idea of none,
To some a magicians hoax.
Without a friend for fun,
The thought will never come,
To those who never know.
It forever persists,
It will never leave.
While we can't be saved,
And with nothing to be,
At our core we're not gone.
How To Get Your Art On Deviant Art's Front PageHow To Get Your Art On Deviant Art's Front Page
1) You must be a girl, but not just any girl. You must be that one, stereotypical, skinny, curvy chick who is simply “Ms. Perfect”.
2) Get a cheap camera. A cell phone is much preferred.
3) Stand in your room (or anywhere actually), remove most of your clothes (if not all of them).
4) Strike some erotic pose that those models in the Wal-Mart magazines can pull of so much better than you, and make sure you're really doing it, so that it borderlines some sick porno.
5) Complain that it's art when people mistake it for porn. Accept compliments from creepy pervs.
6) Do it all over again. And act like you're surprised when you get the attention.
How Not To Get Your Art on Deviant Art's Front Page
1) Be an artist (this includes writers an
I'm Only HumanI'm only Human.
I bleed when I'm cut
I cry when I'm hurt
I love when I shouldn't.
I'm only Human.
My rage feeds my Demon.
My pain starves my Angel.
My cuts on my wrist are numb.
I'm only Human.
I'm not a toy.
I'm an adult.
I'm not a child.
I'm only Human,
And this is my biggest weakness.
This is all I will ever be
hey newton, gravity's flawedi.
starting anew from the flutter
and the sputter of lungs.
a vacant sea filled with feathers
and tumultuous clatter,
ribs in a treacherous pattern
resembling exiting rungs.
i want to wrestle the angels,
your tendency is the ladder.
involved with full indiscretion,
trading lazy for lace.
unspool the curse of the long-
limbs in a languorous flexion
i like the stab of the ankles,
you need the curves intersected.
opting to cull my extents
with trans-dimensional vigor.
spent my dysphoric corrections
on reconnecting lax ends.
lips in a spurious accent
feign a passionate rigor.
i tie myself to the anchor,
you extricate and ascend.
5:20i went to the forest
to purify my lungs
then i saw the thick
three letter scar
i left in a slender
birch, and wondered how
i could let you poison
another living thing.
moths aren't afraid of pins
till they're stuck to a piece of styrofoam.
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More